Larry David gets a laugh during his opening monologue for Saturday Night Live on Saturday (February 6).
The 68-year-old comedian joked about hosting the show years after he had given a terrible audition, and how he couldnt wait to leave his monologue once it was over.
Now here I am hosting, and its all very well and good, but honestly, I cant wait to leave, Larry joked. In fact, I would say that one of the great pleasures of my life is leaving anywhere I am.
Watch Larrys monologue, posted by Gossip Cop, below!
What a waterboarding reconstruction looks like - BBC News
GOP frontrunner Donald Trump asserted on Sunday that he could legalize waterboarding and even harsher forms of torture simply by declassifying the tactics.
During an interview on CNN, host Jake Tapper pointed out that Trumps plan to bring back interrogations techniques that were worse than waterboarding ran afoul of a 2006 law which made waterboarding a war crime.
I would go through a process and get it declassified, Trump explained. And certainly [I would support] waterboarding at a minimum. Theyre chopping off heads of Christians and many other people in the Middle East.
You can say what you want. I have no doubt that it does work in terms of information and other things and maybe not always but nothing works always. But I have no doubt that it works, he insisted. When theyre chopping off the heads of people and innocent people in most cases beyond waterboarding is fine with me.
Watch the video below from CNNs State of the Union, broadcast Feb. 7, 2016.
SEOUL, South Korea - For North Korea"s propaganda machine, the long-range rocket launch Sunday carved a glorious trail of "fascinating vapor" through the clear blue sky. For South Korea"s president, and other world leaders, it was a banned test of dangerous ballistic missile technology and yet another "intolerable provocation."
The rocket was launched from North Korea"s west coast only two hours after an eight-day launch window opened Sunday morning, its path tracked separately by the United States, Japan and South Korea. No damage from debris was reported.
North Korea, which calls its launches part of a peaceful space program, said it had successfully put a new Earth observation satellite, the Kwangmyongsong 4, or Shining Star 4, into orbit less than 10 minutes after liftoff. It vowed more such launches. A U.S. official said it might take days to assess whether the launch was a success.
The launch follows North Korea"s widely disputed claim last month to have tested a hydrogen bomb. Washington and its allies will consider the rocket launch a further provocation and push for more tough sanctions.
CBS News" Pamela Falk reports the U.N. Security Council called for an emergency closed-door meeting on Sunday in response to North Korea"s launch, after delaying a response to a test of a miniaturized hydrogen nuclear device by North Korea in January because of divisions on the Council about how to respond.
U.N. Secretary General Ban Ki-moon called the launch deeply deplorable and called on North Korea to halt the provocative actions saying that he is committed to working with all sides to denuclearize the Korean peninsula.
World leaders, including from the U.N., the US, China, South Korea and Japan condemned the latest North Korea long range rocket launch, but the U.N. has limited options to control the erratic government of Kim Jong Un except to increase sanctions that, to date, have not worked to slow the nuclear program in Pyongyang.
North Korea"s longtime ally, China, has become openly critical of the nuclear and missile tests.
North Korean rocket and nuclear tests are seen as crucial steps toward the North"s ultimate goal of a nuclear armed missile that could hit the U.S. mainland. North Korea under leader Kim Jong Un has pledged to bolster its nuclear arsenal unless Washington scraps what Pyongyang calls a hostile policy meant to collapse Kim"s government. Diplomats are also pushing to tighten U.N. sanctions because of the North"s Jan. 6 nuclear test.
In a development that will worry both Pyongyang and Beijing, a senior South Korean Defense Ministry official, Yoo Jeh Seung, told reporters that Seoul and Washington have agreed to begin talks on a possible deployment of the THADD missile defense system in South Korea. North Korea has long decried the 28,500 U.S. troops stationed in South Korea, and Beijing would see a South Korean deployment of THAAD, which is one of the world"s most advanced missile defense systems, as a threat to its interests in the region.
In a statement, North Korea"s National Aerospace Development Administration, in typical propaganda-laden language, praised "the fascinating vapor of Juche satellite trailing in the clear and blue sky in spring of February on the threshold of the Day of the Shining Star." Juche is a North Korean philosophy focusing on self-reliance; the Day of the Shining Star refers to the Feb. 16 birthday of former dictator Kim Jong Il. North Korea has previously staged rocket launches to mark important anniversaries.
South Korean Defense Ministry spokesman Moon Sang Gyun said a South Korean Aegis-equipped destroyer detected the North Korean launch at 9:31 a.m. The rocket"s first stage fell off North Korea"s west coast at 9:32 a.m., and the rocket disappeared from South Korean radars at 9:36 a.m. off the southwestern coast. There was no reported damage in South Korea.
The U.S. Strategic Command issued a statement saying that it detected and tracked a missile launched on a southern trajectory, but that it did not pose a threat to the United States or its allies.
Japanese broadcaster NHK showed video of an object visible in the skies from the southern Japanese island of Okinawa that was believed to be the rocket. South Korea"s Yonhap news agency later backed away, without elaborating, from a report that said the rocket might have failed.
The global condemnation began almost immediately.
South Korean President Park Geun-hye called the launch an "intolerable provocation." She said the North"s efforts to advance its missile capabilities were "all about maintaining the regime" in Pyongyang and criticized the North Korean leadership for ignoring the hardships of ordinary North Koreans.
Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe vowed to "take action to totally protect the safety and well-being of our people." U.S. National Security Adviser Susan Rice called the North"s missile and nuclear weapons programs a "serious threats to our interests - including the security of some of our closest allies."
The Foreign Ministry in China, the North"s only major ally and its protector in the U.N. Security Council, where Beijing wields veto power, expressed "regret that, disregarding the opposition from the international community, the (North) side obstinately insisted in carrying out a launch by using ballistic missile technologies."
South Korean opposition lawmaker Shin Kyung-min, who attended a closed-door briefing by the National Intelligence Service following Sunday"s launch, said the NIS believes that the rocket"s payload satellite was about twice as heavy as the 220-pound satellite it launched in 2012. The NIS estimates that if the rocket would have been used as a missile, it would have had a potential range of about 5,500 kilometers (3,417 miles), Shin said.
Kim Jong Un has overseen two of the North"s four nuclear tests and three long-range rocket launches since taking over after the death of his father, dictator Kim Jong Il, in late 2011. The U.N. Security Council prohibits North Korea from nuclear and ballistic missile activity. Experts say that ballistic missiles and rockets in satellite launches share similar bodies, engines and other technology.
"If North Korea has only nuclear weapons, that"s not that intimidating. If they have only rockets, that"s not that intimidating, either. But if they have both of them, that means they can attack any target on Earth. So it becomes a global issue," said Kwon Sejin, a professor at the Korea Advanced Institute of Science and Technology.
In 2013, North Korea conducted a nuclear test and then unnerved the international community by orchestrating an escalating campaign of bombast, including threats to fire nuclear missiles at the U.S. and Seoul.
North Korea has spent decades trying to develop operational nuclear weapons. It has said that plutonium and highly enriched uranium facilities at its main Nyongbyon nuclear complex are in operation.
The North is thought to have a small arsenal of crude atomic bombs and an impressive array of short- and medium-range missiles. But it has yet to demonstrate that it can produce nuclear bombs small enough to place on a missile, or missiles that can reliably deliver its bombs to faraway targets.
After several failures testing a multistage, long-range rocket, it put its first satellite into space with a long-range rocket launched in December 2012.
The North"s recent activity comes amid a long-standing diplomatic stalemate. Six-nation negotiations on dismantling North Korea"s nuclear program in exchange for aid fell apart in early 2009.
2016 CBS Interactive Inc. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. The Associated Press contributed to this report.
Marcus Peters Wins AP Defensive Rookie of the Year Award | 2016 NFL Honors
This has been the season of Cam Newton. That continued Saturday night at NFL Honors when he won the MVP with 48 of 50 possible votes.
Newton and J.J. Watt winning big awards was not a surprise during the award show. Watt had a message for all the people that doubted him along the way.
"I was a 2-star recruit coming out, and now I have 3 DPOY awards. So... screw all of you guys for doubting me," Watt said.
It was an emotional night for many. Brett Favre, Tony Dungy, Kevin Greene, Marvin Harrison, Orlando Pace, Eddie DeBartolo Jr., Ken Stabler and d**k Stanfel were announced as the 2016 Pro Football Hall of Fame class.
Comeback Player of the Year Eric Berry provided the most resonant moment of the night talking about the times he "felt like I couldn"t do it anymore" during his battle with cancer. He thanked his mom for being there for him during "lonely nights" and you could see how much the award meant to him. The night wrapped up with Anquan Boldin winning the Walter Payton Man of the Year, a worthy choice for one of the league"s class acts of the last decade.
Here is the full list of winners from the evening:
2016 Pepsi NFL Rookie of the Year: Jameis Winston, QB, Tampa Bay Buccaneers
FedEx Air & Ground Players of the Year: Carson Palmer, QB, Arizona Cardinals; Adrian Peterson, RB, Minnesota Vikings
AP Offensive Rookie of the Year: Todd Gurley, RB, St. Louis Rams
AP Offensive Player of the Year presented by Surface:Cam Newton, QB, Carolina Panthers
Salute To Service Award Presented by USAA: Vincent Jackson, WR, Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Clutch Performer of the Year: Drew Brees, QB, New Orleans Saints
AP Coach of the Year presented by Lenovo: Ron Rivera, Carolina Panthers
Art Rooney Award presented by Bose: Charles Woodson, S, Oakland Raiders
AP Defensive Rookie of the Year:Marcus Peters, CB, Kansas City Chiefs
AP Assistant Coach of the Year:Wade Phillips, Denver Broncos
Don Shula HS Coach of the Year: Michael Burnett, Tuscarora (Virginia) High School
"Greatness on the Road" Award presented by Courtyard: Antonio Brown, WR, Pittsburgh Steelers
AP Defensive Player of the Year: J.J. Watt, DE, Houston Texans
Pro Football Hall of Fame Class of 2016: Brett Favre, QB; Kevin Greene, LB; Marvin Harrison, WR; Orlando Pace, OL; Tony Dungy, coach; Ken Stabler, QB; d**k Stanfel, OL; Eddie DeBartolo, owner
NFL.com Fantasy Player of the Year presented by SAP: Antonio Brown, WR, Pittsburgh Steelers
Deacon Jones Award: J.J. Watt, DE, Houston Texans
AP Comeback Player of the Year: Eric Berry, S, Kansas City Chiefs
Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year presented by Nationwide: Anquan Boldin, WR, San Francisco 49ers
Bridgestone Performance Play of the Year: Aaron Rodgers" stunning Hail Mary vs. Lions
AP Most Valuable Player:Cam Newton, QB, Carolina Panthers
Michigan State Basketball Pump Up 2015-2016 | March Madness Run
Michigan State basketball finds itself in an unfamiliar position late in Big Ten play. The Spartans are 6-4 in conference play putting them in a tie for 6th place along with Ohio State as of Feb. 2, 2016.
The question is can Michigan State win the Big Ten despite having lost four conference games already? History is not on the Spartans side. Since the 2005-06 season only four out of the past 10 teams have won the Big Ten with four or more losses in conference play.
Michigan State is going to need help, but what they really need to do is keep winning. The Spartans next three games are against teams with a better conference record. The three game stretch includes games on Feb. 6 at Michigan, Feb. 9 at Purdue, and Feb. 14 vs. Indiana. If Michigan State can go 3-0 through that stretch, they could be in business.
After a home game against Indiana on Valentines Day the Spartans wont play another ranked opponent until tournament time.
There are five teams that stand in the Spartans way of winning the Big Ten title. The first team is the Iowa Hawkeyes.
Michigan State Spartans guard Denzel Valentine. Photo by: Mike Carter-USA TODAY Sports
The Iowa Hawkeyes defeated the Spartans twice already this season and are the most likely to win the Big Ten. However, five of the last nine games for the Hawkeyes are on the road including trips to Bloomington and Ann Arbor. Iowa is in the driver seat to win the Big Ten with only nine games to go, but stranger things have happened.
Maryland is another team that stands in the way of the Spartans. If you dont remember the Spartans defeated the Terrapins 74-65 on January 23. Maryland has only two conference losses, but also has a tough remaining schedule. The Terrapins still have to play at Purdue and at Indiana which are not guaranteed wins.
The next team in the way of Michigan States run to the Big Ten title is Indiana. The Spartans will host the Hoosiers on Valentines Day. Indiana has one conference loss coming to Wisconsin. Indiana has just one conference loss, but their remaining schedule is brutal. Six of their last nine games will come against teams sitting at sixth place or above in the conference standings. The Hoosiers play Iowa twice, Michigan State on the road, Maryland at home, Michigan on the road, and Purdue at home. It will be hard for the Hoosiers to win the Big Ten with that tough of a schedule.
The Purdue Boilermakers are another team that stand in the way of the Spartans. Michigan State will play Purdue on Feb. 9 in what should be a great game. Michigan State is in a must win situation if they want to have any chance at winning the Big Ten Championship. Just like Indiana, Purdues remaining schedule is brutal. Of their last seven games, five of them will be against top six teams in the Big Ten. Four of the games are against opponents ranked in the top 25. Purdue will have a tough time winning the Big Ten with a schedule like that to end the season.
The last team in the Spartans way is the Michigan Wolverines. Arch rival Michigan has two conference losses and is looking for their second Big Ten Championship in three years. Michigan has won four games straight and will need to keep their run going if they want any shot at a title. Michigan has a back loaded schedule. The Wolverines will play three top 10 teams to finish out the year. Although two of those games are at home, it seems like a difficult task for the Wolverines to win the Big Ten.
Looking at where teams stand heading into the final stretch of Big Ten play Michigan State isnt in too bad of shape. If they can beat Michigan, Purdue, and Indiana, then they should win every game the rest of the regular season. Iowa or Maryland looks like the likely favorite to win the Big Ten, but dont count out the Spartans just yet.
Ron Rivera Wins AP Coach of the Year Award | 2016 NFL Honors
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) Cam Newton has won The Associated Press NFL Most Valuable Player award in a landslide.
The Carolina Panthers All-Pro quarterback, who will lead his team in Sundays Super Bowl against Denver, received 48 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the league. Fellow QBs Tom Brady, a two-time MVP, and Carson Palmer each got one vote.
In his fifth pro season, Newton also earned Offensive Player of the Year. In 2011, he was the leagues top offensive rookie.
Newton set an NFL mark for the position with 45 touchdowns this season: 35 passing and 10 rushing. He also ranked sixth in passer rating (99.4) while throwing for 3,837 yards. His 636 yards on the ground easily led all QBs, and the 10 touchdowns rushing were more than All-Pro running back Doug Martin of Tampa Bay scored.
The award was presented Saturday night during NFL Honors.
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Cam Newtons spectacular season has earned him The Associated Press NFL Offensive Player of the Year award.
The Carolina Panthers All-Pro quarterback set an NFL mark for the position with 45 touchdowns this season: 35 passing and 10 rushing. He also ranked sixth in passer rating (99.4) while throwing for 3,837 yards. His 636 yards on the ground easily led all QBs, and the 10 touchdowns rushing were more than All-Pro running back Doug Martin of Tampa Bay scored.
Those numbers and, of course, leading the Panthers to a league-best 15-1 record in 2015 earned Newton 18 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the NFL. Steelers receiver Antonio Brown was next with 10 votes.
The victory for Newton, the first Panther to win the award, was announced Saturday night during NFL Honors.
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Kansas City safety Eric Berry, who missed 10 games the previous season battling lymphoma, then returned to the Chiefs to become an All-Pro, has won The Associated Press NFL Comeback Player of the Year award.
Berrys inspirational story and superb performance on the field earned him 38 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the league. Berry was a mainstay on a Kansas City defense that sparked a 10-game winning streak during the regular season.
He easily outdistanced Arizona quarterback Carson Palmer, who came back from knee surgery to lead the Cardinals to a 13-3 regular season. Palmer received six votes.
All-Pro running back Adrian Peterson, who sat out all but one game in 2014 in a child abuse case, led the NFL in rushing.
Berrys win was announced Saturday night at the NFL Honors show.
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Ron Rivera has won The Associated Press NFL Coach of the Year award for the second time in three years.
Rivera led the Carolina Panthers to an unprecedented third straight NFC South title and two playoff victories. He has the Panthers in the Super Bowl with a 17-1 record; they face the Denver Broncos on Sunday for the championship.
In a season featuring several outstanding coaching jobs, Rivera easily outdistanced the field. He received 36 1-2 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the league. That was far in front of Kansas Citys Andy Reid with six votes.
Rivera has a career mark of 50-34-1.
The only other Panthers coach to win the award was Dom Capers in 1996.
Rivera was presented the award Saturday night during the NFL Honors show and accepted in a video.
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J.J. Watt has won The Associated Press NFL Defensive Player of the Year award for the third time.
It was not a unanimous selection for the Houston Texans defensive end, as it was last year a first for the honor but it was decisive. In tying Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor as the only players to take the award three times, Watt earned 37 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the NFL.
Rams tackle Aaron Donald received seven votes, followed by two Carolina Panthers: linebacker Luke Kuechly with four, cornerback Josh Norman with two.
Watts superb fifth pro season for the AFC South champions included a league-high 17 1-2 sacks, eight passes defensed, three forced fumbles, one fumble recovery, and general dominance.
Watt received the award Saturday night at NFL Honors.
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St. Louis Rams running back Todd Gurley, who came off knee surgery in college to rush for 1,106 yards, has won The Associated Press Offensive Rookie of the Year award.
Gurley missed the first two games of 2015, then went on a tear that included four straight 100-yard rushing performances: 146, 159, 128 and 133 yards. He finished the season third in league rushing and scored 10 touchdowns.
The first-round draft pick (10th overall) earned 27 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the NFL. He beat out top overall draft selection quarterback Jameis Winston of Tampa Bay, who received 17 votes.
Gurley is the fourth Ram to take the award, joining Hall of Fame RBs Eric Dickerson (1983) and Jerome Bettis (1993), and quarterback Sam Bradford (2010).
The award was presented Saturday night as part of NFL Honors.
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Kansas Citys Marcus Peters is the first cornerback in 17 years to win The Associated Press NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year award.
Peters, a first-round selection (18th overall) out of Washington, was a key to the Chiefs 11-game winning streak this season that helped them to the divisional playoff round. He tied Cincinnatis Reggie Nelson for the NFL lead with eight interceptions. Peters returned two for scores, one covering 90 yards. He also had a pick in the postseason.
That performance earned Peters 45 votes from a nationwide panel of 50 sports writers and broadcasters who regularly cover the NFL. Buffalo CB Ronald Darby was next with four votes, and one ballot went to Jets lineman Leonard Williams.
Oaklands Charles Woodson was the previous cornerback to win the award, which was presented Saturday night as part of NFL Honors.
(Copyright 2016 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.)
Jack Huston"s Action Flick Marries Pride and Prejudice with Zombies
When it was published in 2009,Pride and Prejudice and Zombieswas like nothing people had seen before, infusingJane Austens classicnovel ofsubversion with ahealthy dose of shambling undead zeitgeist. Pre-release attention from the likes of NPR led topublic curiosity, whichmadeSeth Grahame-Smiths novel hugely popularand in turn led to a cottage industry of public-domain-literature-plus-monsters mashup fiction.
Now, almost seven years after the books release, director Burr Steers film adaptation of PPZis hitting theaters. In those intervening years, so many other genre mashup movies have come along thatZombies original concept seems almost rote. (The adaptation of Grahame-Smiths Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter, for example, made it to theaters in 2012.) But Steers film stands out;unlike other high-low pulp cocktails, this one happens toalso the most fiercely feminist version of Jane Austens novel ever filmed.
Pumping Up Prides Feminist Message
For his part, Grahame-Smith is quick to reject the idea that Austens novel didnt have those elements to begin with. No feminism has been added to the book that wasnt there in the original, he says. Its just taking what Austen already did and injecting it with steroids.
But its undeniable that themonstrous conceit of Zombies doesnt change the stakes for the Bennett sistersand, in fact, give them more agency. In Austens novel, Mrs. Bennett frets constantly about marrying off her daughters, because as women they cannot inherit any property. In the movie version of events, England is a beleaguered shell of a country in the midst of a zombie outbreak, with small outposts holding out against the walking dead. Mr. Bennett (played by Tywin Lannister himself, Charles Dance) has raised his daughters to be fierce warriors, insisting they are trained for battle, not cooking.
In a world where survival is a daily struggle against a supernatural phenomenon, the Bennetts dont need men to protect them, so they can afford to seek a partner based on genuine affection.
Zombies roam the countryside, and any carriage ride or public ball could turn into a brain feast, so survival is the number one concern for everyone. Theres still a streak of classismCharles Bingleys sisters, for example, look down on the Bennetts for receiving their training from a Shaolin temple in China instead of in Japan like the upper classes. But the sisters arent simplycompetent survivors like the rest oftheir peerstheyre superwarriors, slicing apart zombie hordes and rescuing men left and right. In a world where survival is a daily struggle against a supernatural phenomenon, the Bennetts dont need men to protect them; they can afford to seek a partner based on genuine affection.
And in this telling, second daughter Lizzie (Lily James, in a role thats the polar opposite of her turn as Cinderella last year) doesnt just verbally spar with monster hunter Fitzwilliam Darcy (Sam Riley). She out-duels him with a sword, and even impresses Lady Catherine de Bourgh (Lena Headey, another Game of Thrones veteran) with her strength. In Pride and Prejudice, Lizzie stoodout because her wit and outspokenness is at odds with the way society insisted women act. In Zombies, shes even more extreme, finding that her courage increases with every attempt to intimidate her.
Zombies Most Empowering Change
As with any novel-to-film adaptation, there were many changes to Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, the most significant being that it turns the otherwise languid third act into a battle royale. But its what happens in the midst of that scrum that might be the movies most female-empowering change.Austens novel ended with Lizzie giving in to the feelings that had takenhold of her the first moment she saw Darcygoingfrom being repulsed by Darcys words to being impressed by his actions to help her family, and ultimately to falling for him. Its as confusing as it iscontroversial, coming as it does after she so completely demonstrates her independence.
Lizzie and elder sister Jane are the leading warriors in the films largest zombie battle. They are the agents of their own destinies.
The book ofZombiesfollowed Austens original footsteps, having Lizzie give up her sword in order to marry Darcy.Steers film, though, rejects that ambiguity outright:The climactic battleseesLizzie and hersister Jane leading the charge inthe films largest battle against the zombies. Jane saves her beloved Bingleya capable but frightened officerand during the ensuing wedding ceremony, the officiant asks the brides if they take their respective men to be their husbandsbut not the other way around. This time around, the womenare the agents of their own destinies.
Smith says his goal was staying as close to Austens story as possible, to see how closely I could hew to the original text and surgically graft onahopefully seamless genre piece. But since the film has already transcended static text in favor of the graphic sensory overload of genre films, it goes even further in characterization to emphasize how independent and in-control the Bennetts deserve to be.
More Than Just Another Mashup
In the subsequent years since the book was a hit, mashup ideas have come and gone. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter went from page to screen in only two years. The Walking Dead remains a juggernautfor AMC. World War Z is getting a sequel, thanks to box office receipts that trumpedits middling reviews. If the same cultural fascinationthat surroundedPride and Prejudice and Zombies had also put the first incarnation of the filmstarring Natalie Portman and directed by David O. Russellon the fast track to theaters, perhaps it wouldve presaged the zombie craze much like the book.
But even if it doesnt have the same finger-on-the-pulse feel that Smiths novel did in 2009, Steers film is still far more complex than the silliness its title suggests. This is no Snakes on a Plane. Its a work of recombinationthat transcends the mashuppigeonholeby adding strains of Kill Bill, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and Thelma and Louise. It may not be a cinematic masterpiece, or even be logically consistentbut its still far more vital than its premise suggests. And it contains the best simultaneous marriage proposal/fight scene of all time.
